A Note to My Hillary Supporter Friends- This is my coming out letter

Hey friends. I have a secret that is going to require you to use all the amazing attributes that I absolutely love about you.  Understanding, acceptance, love, respect.  The truth is that you are some of the most loving people I know but I'm still a little scared to actually come out to you like this.  Maybe it's the posts I've seen all over social media claiming how stupid I am or how racist and bigoted and judgmental I must be.  But right now I need a friend so here it goes.

I voted for Trump.

There it is.  It's out there and I should feel so much better but I'm scared that you will judge me.  That you will treat me differently.  That you will talk about how stupid I am behind my back.  I'm afraid that you now think the worst of me and that I won't be invited to your holiday party and that you definitely won't trust me with your real feelings and that intimacy we once had will be lost.

I had hoped that we could all get along after the election was over.  I had no idea that this election was more important than all our similarities until it has been pointed out to me over and over again in the last 48 hours.

I am sorry that your candidate didn't win.  I feel for you and the disappointment that you are going through.  To tell you the truth, I thought that I would be feeling that disappointment at the end of the night but the country surprised us all didn't it?

And to say I was jumping up and down when my candidate won would be lying.  I am not political and I was not a fan of either candidate for the longest time.  But when it came down to it I had to make a decision that felt good to me.  I value truth and hold that attribute high.  I picked a non-politician for that very reason.   I concluded that the guy stumbling over the right thing to say and down right saying the wrong thing sometimes is actually telling us more of his truth than the professional lawyer that has been trained to persuade for her benefit.  This is why I voted for Trump.  Not because I agree with everything that he says.  But because I feel that he has good intentions and competent people that can accomplish things that are good for America.

I believe that you voted for your candidate for reasons that speak to you and I respect that.  There is obviously something to be said for both candidates to have the country so torn. 

And that brings me to the real reason for this note.  We are friends.  And if I'm not wrong, you want more than anything to have more love, acceptance, and respect in our country.   And I do too.

This nation needs to put aside our different political stances and just be nice to each other.  We need to develop respect for each others differences, deal with differences like adults and adopt a practice of more love and understanding no matter who the president is.  We, the people, make up this country and if there was ever anything that could bind us during this time, it would be love, love for the country and for each other.  

Let's show the world how amazing Americans really are.  Let's show respect for everyone.  Let's believe in the good of everyone.  Let's not judge others for their beliefs.  Let's raise good kids and create a great future because we all know that what happens in our own house is much more important than what happens in the white house.  Let's do this together as friends.

I hope you feel better soon and I love you!

Em

My Mom Proven Ways to Boost Energy Naturally

"Why did I think it would be a good idea to walk the kids to school?" I think as I slowly contort my body, sneaking out from under the sleeping baby that only just barely closed her eyes.  The sun now slowly lifting herself from a long night's rest.  Stretching her fingers above the tops of the mountains like she's peaking out from under the covers.  I haven't seen that for awhile.   Summer has been good to me.

Last night was not good to me though.  Last night was very abusive.  Despite spending the last couple of weeks of summer getting the kids on a schedule again, the excitement of the first day of school fought hard to keep the kids awake.  I think Jack finally closed his eyes around 1:30 a.m., right about the time that Thea woke up crying, waking up a very sleepy Kate. "I'll never sleep again," I think.  I'm more angry than tired.  After getting both girls back to sleep I peek at my phone.  2:30 a.m.  6:30 is going to come pretty early, but I force myself not to worry about it because that will keep me up all night.  Funny how that works.

So 6:30 came really early this morning.  And now because of my brilliant idea to walk my kids to school, I actually have to get ready.  I will be seeing real people and I doubt my kids want me talking to the neighbors in my pajamas.  Maybe I can take the three year old and the baby in their PJs.  Nah, I should get them up and ready too.  And to top it all off, I told the kids I would make cinnamon rolls.  Oh today is going to be a day!

Luckily getting no sleep and still being able to get things done is pretty much my super power.   Tragically I don't drink caffeine so the only way I survive is by using a few natural habits I've developed to keep things going. And since I graduated in nutrition and exercise science most of them revolve around lifestyle management.

Here are few ideas that will help after your next sleepless night.

1. Exercise

I know it seems like the last thing you want to do when you've been up all night, but it makes such a difference.  Sometimes I am so tired that I can't even get motivated to put on my sports bra.  I mean, that takes work.  But even on those days, if I can just take a walk in the neighborhood (no sports bra required) I feel so much more invigorated.  In fact studies show that the days where more daily steps were taken, subjects reported having higher levels of energy.  In fact 20 percent more energy was reported and a 65 percent decrease in fatigue.

So which exercises help the most to boost energy?  Light to Moderate workouts will generate the largest amounts of energy without depleting your resources.  The best activities include walking, yoga, Tai Chi, Pilates, and strength training.

2. Drink More Water

So anyone that knows me know that this is my cure all for anything that ails you.  Stomach hurts, drink more water.  Can't lose weight, drink more water.  High blood pressure, drink more water.  No energy, DRINK MORE WATER!  It will seriously solve any problem you have.  Except maybe having to pee too much.  I don't think it helps with that.

The truth is water helps maintain fluid balance in our bodies which aids with our physical performance and fights fatigue and exhaustion.  Just a glass of water can clear our minds and help us to think better. It helps increase your attention span, memory, and motor skills and will naturally lighten your mood.

3. Have A Snack

Being a new mom again, I am constantly watching what I eat so I can lose those pesky pregnancy pounds.  I've kind of gotten used to being hungry all the time so that is not always a natural trigger for me to eat.  But I've noticed if I haven't eaten in a while, I will start nodding off and yawning like nobody's business.  This fatigue has become my new trigger.  It lets me know I need fuel.  So what is the best thing to eat when your feeling drowsy?  Find a good snack that has protein, fiber, and a little bit of fat.  Peanut butter is always a good bet.  Also try yogurt and nuts, or hummus and pita chips.  My personal favorite is a banana and peanut butter smoothie.  Energy for days!

4. Take Time To Laugh

You know what they say, laughter is the best medicine and it's true!  We change physiologically when we laugh.  We stretch muscles in our face and body, our pulse and blood pressure rise, and we breathe faster, sending more oxygen to our tissues, creating more energy!  The effects of laughter and exercise are actually very similar! So take some time today to watch a funny YouTube video or visit with your funniest friend.  It's good for your health and you will be much more productive with the rest of your day!

5. Good Nutrition

Fill your body with fresh fruits and vegetables and you will notice a difference in your energy levels within just a couple of days.  These foods are packed with vitamins and minerals that will kick your energy into high gear.  Some of these vitamins include Magnesium, B vitamins, and Iodine.  If you don't think your diet is giving you enough of the good stuff there is no shame is popping a multivitamin.  Supplementing is a great way to to make sure you are getting what your body needs to stay alert.

6. Massage Your Ears

It might sound funny but only to us here in the western hemisphere.  This technique has been used for thousands of years to help increase energy.  The reasoning behind it is that all your acupuncture points run through the outer edges of your ears.  Pinch the outside edges of the ear and massage them up and down and you will notice a significant increase in energy!  I know you're doing it right now and it works right?!  You're welcome.

Tips for Feeding a Large Family Without Using Coupons | Big Family Living

I have nothing but love and respect for all you fabulous couponing mommies.  You are organized, all planned out, filling your cart to the brim and saving hundreds of dollars without even a bead of sweat on your forehead.  It really sounds lovely.  But it also sounds something like the families you see on TV.  They are close to reality so you think, "I can be like that!" but when you look closer you sadly realize that this scenario could never be a reality in this life.  My reality looks more like one of those old shopping game shows where you dash up and down the rows as quickly as possible.  Manically grabbing everything on my list, hoping to beat the buzzer... the nerve wracking cry of the baby.  And if I can get all the way to the end of my list before the three year old lets go of the cart and jumps into the frozen food fridges, it's like I've won the Olympic Gold Medal for the Grocery Store Dash.

Honestly, though, I wish I had the time to coupon and I do save a few coupons here and there for items I use all the time, but I've just accepted the fact that couponing is not going to happen for me.  That being said, I have made a list of ways you can save money on the bags and bags of food it takes to feed a big family without the prep work of coupons.  Let's get started:


Make a Menu

This is the most important thing you can do.  It does take some time, but it is so worth it.  You need to sit down and plan out your family's breakfast, lunch, dinner, and snack menu for each and every day.


Obey 

The Menu Like Its The Bible

Okay so there can be a little wiggle room, but to make the biggest impact you really should just stick to the menu.  For me this means just buying the ingredients for the meals and snacks on the list.  I don't buy anything else.  Nothing!  And I don't let anyone treat my kitchen like an all night diner, coming in and ordering snacks and meals at all hours of the night.  They get what is put in front of them on the table and that's it.  There was a time I was even writing the snacks for the day on the food board and they couldn't even choose their snack.  I know... crazy.  I have since relaxed a little bit now that the kids have gotten older, but I still have a mental list of the snacks I have planned and when they are gone, no more snacks.


Buy Generic

Okay I will agree that there are some products that you just need to get the name brand, but I can't think of too many.  There are so many great store brand items that taste fantastic and many actually come from the same factory as the name brands.  I love buying generic!  This love has been the biggest reason why I don't use coupons.  Coupons will give you a discount on just the name brands and you almost always need to buy two or more to get the same kind of discount that you get from just picking up the generic version.  'Nuf said.


Shop Around

For awhile I bought everything at Walmart because they will price match and I really thought it was great to get all my shopping done in one place.  It still is a great idea, but for my situation, I have noticed I can get better groceries and better deals by shopping around.  Yes it is a bit of a pain but totally worth it for me.  For example, I will hit the big warehouse stores, like Sam's Club for my bread, bananas, milk, butter, and some meat and cheese products.  They have great prices and quantities that meet my large family needs.  I can really get better deals at my favorite grocery store for everything else so then I walk away.  This is where I have to be strong.  It is tough but you can do it ladies.  My next stop is where I get most of my groceries.  Its the store in town with the best produce, great employees, and great prices.  If by chance something on my list is terribly over priced here, then I take it to my final store, Walmart.  I always hit Walmart for my Popcorn and Graham Crackers because they are so much less expensive there.  I also get whatever items were not priced well or available at the last store.  I will use an app like Scan Life or PriceGrabber to compare prices on the items I need now and Walmart will match the lowest price.  I have been using this system for years now and have saved even more than I could have with coupons I swear.


Limit The Amount of Times You Eat Out, Including Hubby's Lunches

Making meals for my husband has been something that I have been dragging my feet about for years.  I know it is healthier and money saving, but I just have so much that I'm already doing that it  seemed...just hard.  That would mean adding another 7 meals to my menu plan.  And more shopping, ugh.  But I can say that I have been making Brenden's meals for a few weeks now and it really does save on money.  It takes a little time to get in the habit, but it does make a difference.
Besides just my husband's lunches, I also try to make sure I'm around in the evenings to make dinner whenever possible.  There are always days when it just doesn't work and you need to grab a pizza, but nowadays I try to schedule in the days that we eat out as a family to make sure that we don't spend too much.

Try these ideas out and let me know what tips you have as well.  I would love to see what other super moms do.

20 Thoughts On Having Six Children

One of the last posts I wrote mentioned how I just wanted to, "leave this year open to a little mystery.  Kind of a feeling of letting the wind take me where it will."  So it seems as if the wind has blown me towards a familiar land...baby island.  

I know it's been a long time since my last post but with good reason.  We found out that we were expecting our sixth child in February of this year.  It was a little bit of a surprise but the best kind we could have imagined.  The expecting and arrival of Thea has been just what our family needed.  

I do realize though... that the idea of a large family is foreign to most people (especially outside of our state) and so I have decided to share: 


20 Thoughts and Facts I've Found on Having Six Children 

1.  Fact:  Surveys in recent years show that less than 2% of families today have 6 kids and .5% of families have 7 kids or more.  This means that I now belong to a very elite and little understood group of super women.

2.  I cannot count the number of times people have stopped me at the store with, "Oh my!  Are they are yours?" or "You have your hands full!"  or my favorite, "Are they all from one father?"  Honestly I enjoy it. There is a sense of accomplishment knowing that I do something every day that few other women can imagine possible and with a smile to boot!

3.   Did you know that those who do have six children are presumed to be very religious or not very educated or both. My husband and I are religious, well-educated, and just love children. (Well at least our children.)

4.  Studies show having six children can be the mark of the eccentric or the genius. The psychologist Alison Gopnik wrote a very fine essay about her brilliant, eccentric parents and the six children they produced, including, besides Alison, her brother Adam, the New Yorker writer, and her brother Blake, the art critic. The novelist and director Galt Niederhoffer is one of six daughters; their father is, according to The New York Times, “one of the most successful (and most idiosyncratic) money managers in the nation.” I claim to be both eccentric and genius.  haha

5.   I am very mindful that many people want more children than they have but have been unable to have them. My hubby and I talk about how lucky we are every day.

6.  We all want to leave something behind when we leave this world and if all else fails I will leave progeny. Not a bad legacy if you ask me.

7.  And I won’t be lonely in old age. Maybe they won’t all love me and take care of me, but the odds are good that one of them will. Maybe two.

8.  I come from a thrifty upbringing which I love and think more people should adopt.  And now, finally, having our cute little sixth addition has given me the power I was lacking before, to instill these beliefs in my kids. 

9.  Up until now I have been in a tug-of-war between the belief of giving my kids things that I didn't have so they wouldn't be deprived or left out, and the belief that sometimes the answer is no and that they will have to earn or wait until its right.  Now I clearly can say no to things we don't need and not feel guilt.   I can explain to the kids that it’s because of our sacrifices that this family works.  We are not like the majority of families.  Sometimes we will have to make sacrifices but we also have things that some other families might not.    This is just one of the many lessons that I think kids can learn from growing up in a large family.

10.   No, I don't like pregnancy, at all. I'm not sentimental about it. I literally told my doctor before I knew that I was pregnant that if I ever was pregnant again it would kill me.  I had to come back two weeks later, tail between my legs, for my first prenatal visit.  I'm not going to lie...everyone in his office had a good laugh about it. 

11.  One of the joys I got during this pregnancy was having everyone ask if this was my first.  I always took it as a compliment and then loved shocking them when I said, "No we have a few more.  This is our sixth."  Always put a smile on my face no matter how awful I was feeling.

12.  One of the unexpected joys of parenting this many kids is that it has given me new reasons to admire my husband.  He is awesome!  I don't think I would have known how amazing he could be if we had only had one or two children.  I tend to take control in the parenting department and it wasn't until I knew I couldn't control all the kids by myself that he blossomed into this amazing dad!  And I give him props for patience.  Patience with me in the early days as I tried to do everything by myself and patience with the kids which include 4 dramatic daughters.

13.  And he was raised to do this job.  His 3 sisters did a very good job of teaching him how to be an awesome, understanding man surrounded by beautiful women. 

14.  Having six kids has opened up a whole new world to me.  People all the time are telling me about how they grew up in a big family, like 8-10 kids, and how they want that too.  These are people I have known for years and we have never had these conversations before.  I'm not sure if it's because people are afraid to admit it until they are with other large families or what but I love being a member of this new club.

15.  I have come up with unique ways to deal with the responsibility.  Sometimes when I get the chance to be in the car alone, I blast the radio in the old minivan and pretend I'm 20 again with no kids.  And sometimes I get mad that I'm in a minivan because it ruins the whole illusion. 

16.  Yes, I am very tired. 

17.  But I use my fatigue like a super power.  It's like the Hulk and his anger.  The secret is that I'm always tired.  You can control it when it’s constantly with you!  I'm not sure what I would do it I was ever well rested. 

18.  There are things I miss about life before parenthood.  Showering without interruptions.  Conversation with the hubs without interruptions.  Sleep without interruptions.  (I'm starting to see a pattern here.)

19.  But those interruptions are the cutest little things ever and most of the time they are jumping into my conversations to tell me something they are so excited about.  Or jumping into my bed because they know I can make it all better.  It's nice to be surrounded by people that still have a lust for life and who need me wholeheartedly.  Someday they won't. 

20.  We're happy!  Yes life can be hectic and weekend dates can't come soon enough, but I would not change it for anything.  Family is everything to me and I have created a life surrounded by what I love most.  There is nothing better than that!

This article was inspired by Mark Oppenheimer's post Forty Thoughts on a Fourth Daughter.  You can read it here.

Sending your child to school with the best valentines box ever!!

The week of Valentines is crazy around our home.  I'm not sure exactly why it happens this way every year, but it does.  And this year was no different.  We started out the week with a demolition of our kitchen.  You know, just kind of spur of the moment!

My mom's husband was super kind in offering his help in lifting up the ceiling in our 1980s kitchen and of course we said yes!  Our kitchen ceiling was let's say "unique" with its florescent lights and spiffy plastic panels that creates the illusion that your in a spaceship.  Totally Rad.

But after a full weekend of work, we still had a half finished kitchen.  We still had mud dust falling on to our counter tops and this was about the point when I realized, "What the Who?!  I forgot we are having a party on Thursday for my hot hubby's birthday!"  (I know I should have realized, but my mind sometimes focuses soley on the present.  It's the only way to prevent insanity, you know?)   Anyway...  Stress! But then again, they are our family and friends. They'll love us no matter what and they can live with a little dust in their birthday cake, right?  So we're good.

I went about the beginning of this week cleaning the house, finishing up photography work, buying presents for my hot hubby (Happy Birthday Babe) and it wasn't until Wednesday night that I realized that we still hadn't done Valentines Boxes or cards.  And this was at 9:30 at night!

Having four kids that needed them made, I was thrilled that my youngest Kate decided that she was good making her own with no help from mom.  She came up with her own design.  Cut the paper, glued it down.  Everything from start to finish.  I looked it over briefly as I was dashing between the other three helpless kids, looking for markers, cutting papers just right and designing fancy boxes and I decide that she had done an awesome job!  She made a rainbow and everything.   And after all, she is in kindergarten so how fancy should it really be.

It wasn't until I dropped her off at school this morning that I noticed just how much hers stuck out like a sore thumb.  A sore thumb with a rainbow on it.  Everyone had beautifully designed and executed boxes that looked like they could be bought at some designer craft box store (yes there might be such a place) and here was little Kate with her oatmeal box covered in what looked like scraps of miss shaped construction paper.  Not a heart or trace of glitter to be found.  I felt my heart drop for a second thinking that she was going to feel bad.  But then I looked at her cute smooshy face and by George, she was proud!  She had made that thing all on her own and we had told her nothing except for how awesome it was.   And in that moment I realized that she truly had the best valentines box ever.  She had made a box that had empowered her and channeled her creativity and expressed who she was.  She had had fun making it too and I could have so easily screwed that up.

Case in point:
As she was finishing up her box the night before, I was busy telling Jack how much trouble he was in for losing a part of his box's design that I had purchased (yes spent money on!) and how now it wasn't going to look good.  Mind you, this is after I had already changed his design to mine because "it would be better" and I had taking the scissors out of his hands a couple times to make sure the cuts were right.  He looked at me with his wise eyes and said, "so I don't get to do anything for my box?"

Man, don't you hate when they are right.

Letting go a little and allowing your children to explore, get hurt, take risks, discover and make a shotty Valentine's box is really what I want to do for my kids.  This world is such a protected place for our kids that they aren't allowed to do anything.  I'd hate to be the mom that doesn't let them explore where it's safe, like our home, just because I'm afraid they might get hurt emotionally.  I hope that I can start letting my kids experience life as it should be. Full of joy, disappointment, accomplishment, awe, fear, discovery and pain and still provide them with a loving safe place to rest and think up new adventures.  Here's to new goals:  NO more micromanaging the little stuff!

Today i'm thankful for lessons learned from the little ones.  Happy Valentines Day!

Out with the old, in with the new

Is it just me or has this been the best. winter. ever?  And no I do not want to hear about how we won't have any water in the summer... yada yada yada.  I am focusing on the positive here people! :)

I don't know about you guys but I was so happy to say goodbye to 2014.  I routinely just go through the motions of New Years Eve and don't totally put my heart into ringing in the new year.  Maybe it's because I celebrate it at home surrounded my five really tired little people, watching the rest of New York get really excited for a new day, but I just don't really feel it, you know?  That being said...this year I felt it!  I was so happy to start new.  Maybe it was that string of bad luck we had around the holidays (we literally were "out" with all our old appliances and forced into new ones), but I was so pumped to put it all behind me and start fresh.

So did I make any goals?  Yes and no.  I'm trying to leave this year open to a little mystery.  Kind of a feeling of letting the wind take me where it will.  Not being afraid of the dark unknown, but being a light, a force, that the dark is afraid of.

But I also want to be thinner, so...

So I've started a new way of feeding our family and I really want it to stick because it truly is the best way to eat.  Some of you may know that back before I was the super mom I am today with snot on my shirt and house full of toys and chaos, I  had graduated from the University in Nutrition and Health.  These last few months I've been reading up on the best ways to help my family get healthy and based on what I know from before and what I have learned I really do feel like I have found what is best for us.

I have started feeding my family a BUNCH  more fruits and veggies with only a small amount of fish, sometimes chicken, and whole grains.  Sounds easy but it has been a struggle to find new recipes that will fill my family up and make people happy.  So I have decided to post good recipes when I find them and then if anyone else is looking to do the same thing, maybe this will help.

Today I want to share the link to this recipe.  It totally filled up my family when paired with some all natural or homemade tortilla chips and the kids loved it.  My only suggestion is to watch the amount of peppers that you put in.  The first time I made it it was perfect.  The second time, it just about burned our mouths off so be careful, but it's SO good!

ONE PAN MEXICAN QUINOA

Prep Time10 minutes

Cook Time25 minutes

Total Time35 minutes

Yield4 servings

Wonderfully light, healthy and nutritious. And it's so easy to make - even the quinoa is cooked right in the pan!

INGREDIENTS

• 1 tablespoon olive oil
• 2 cloves garlic, minced
• 1 jalapenos, minced
• 1 cup quinoa
• 1 cup vegetable broth
• 1 (15-ounce) can black beans, drained and rinsed
• 1 (14.5 oz) can fire-roasted diced tomatoes
• 1 cup corn kernels
• 1 teaspoon chili powder
• 1/2 teaspoon cumin
• Kosher salt and freshly ground black pepper, to taste
• 1 avocado, halved, seeded, peeled and diced
• Juice of 1 lime
• 2 tablespoons chopped fresh cilantro leaves

Make Glazed Baby Carrots with Brown Sugar.

 

INSTRUCTIONS

• Heat olive oil in a large skillet over medium high heat. Add garlic and jalapeno, and cook, stirring frequently, until fragrant, about 1 minute.
• Stir in quinoa, vegetable broth, beans, tomatoes, corn, chili powder and cumin; season with salt and pepper, to taste. Bring to a boil; cover, reduce heat and simmer until quinoa is cooked through, about 20 minutes. Stir in avocado, lime juice and cilantro.
• Serve immediately.

10 Reasons Why Christmas Is Not For The Weak

Christmas can be filled with joy and excitement but it can also be filled with stress!  Especially for moms.  Here is my ode to the Christmas stresses of my season.  It's all in fun!

The following is a true story.  The names and circumstances have NOT been changed to protect the innocence or add dramatic impact. Tis the season!  :)

Twas the month before Christmas and everything had gone wrong.
Instead of Christmas carols, we were singing our swan song.
The 6 stockings were hung doubled up on 3 hooks.
The other hooks and seventh stocking must have been stolen by crooks.
The children were nestled all snug in their beds,
Until Lillie's came crashing down.  Her feet landed over her head.
The dishwasher had died and the dished piled up.
Now three kids were due for shots and doctor check ups.
When out of no where the telephone rang.
Our Christmas client had cancelled.  No Christmas cash came.
A cancelled family party, and big family fight.
Now the Tree has gone dark, so we re-string the lights.
A broken car windshield, a broken candy dish and there's more.
I still haven received Mila's present at my door.
"THAT'S IT!"  I shout out and throw my hands in the air
"This Christmas is cursed!  I don't even know why I care!"
"The presents, I've wrapped twenty times thanks to Grif
Everyone knows what their getting and I feel a bit miffed!"
Everything I've spent these past few weeks have put me in debt.
All I want is a break, and a KitKat would help I would bet.
So I ran to my room with my hands in my face,
And that's when I felt, all the love in this place.
So things had gone wrong but my family was great.
They did everything to remind me of what was truly on my plate.
Holiday traditions and childhood joy.
Love and excitement as we celebrate the birth of a boy.
Not just a boy but the Everlasting Prince of Peace.
The King of All whose love will not cease.
This year I will focus on the fact that "All is calm, All is bright."
Merry Christmas to all and to all a good night!

Haha!  It's been one for the champions but I know I"m not alone.  Merry Christmas to all the mom's stressing during this Christmas season.  I feel you and I got your back!  Go ahead and throw that fit you have been wanting to throw.  It's okay.  You'll still be on the nice list!  I love you!

And honestly, I love this time to be able to focus on the Savior and Family!  The two most important things in my life!  Life is good!

Merry Christmas everyone!  I hope you all have a wonderful Christmas season!

If It Scares You It Might Be A Good Thing To Try

I had the wonderful and frightening opportunity of doing something new this week.   At the beginning of this year, as we sipped our Christmas mugs filled with sparkling cider, I challenged myself to take advantage of any opportunity I get, to do something new and out of the ordinary.  As a stay at home mom of five, I can sometimes feel like a prisoner in a jail of my own making, guarded by a little army that I created myself.  Its good most days, but it gets really hard to deal with when I see other people growing and changing and I feel like I'm withering without the light of a new idea, experience, or thought even.

The majority of my new experiences thus far have been along the lines of trying hot peppers with my Habit Burger or slacklining in the front yard, but this week I actually did something that pushed my limits.  Due to scheduling, I was coerced into covering a bridal photoshoot for one of our clients.  I know it doesn't sound too scary but for someone that has only shot as a second shooter or for family and friends, the idea of doing a shoot for a real paying client without even an assistant scared the pants off of me.

I wasn't so much worried about my ability to take photos (if I had I wouldn't have done it) but I knew I would have to put on the whole "photographer" show and that so isn't me.  I am not a showboat and I'm not terribly confidant about being in charge, but I knew I had to fake all that to build trust between me and the bride so that we could get the best photos possible.  Ahh!  Pressure.

I prepared as much as I could have before the day of the shoot and was feeling pretty good about it despite that forecast of rain and lightening storms (Did I mention that the photo shoot was on top of a mountain ski resort?  Ahh!  More pressure.).  Still the anxiety wanted to creep in like a cold breeze against a door.  I knew it was there but I tried not to pay any attention to it.  That would only feed it and give it power.  I started to think about positive things as I traveled up the winding mountain road.  A friend of mine had paid me a compliment that week and it had really affected me.  It wasn't much but just what I needed that day.  "You are so beautiful," she had said, "I don't think you even realize how beautiful you are and when you smile, the world is yours."

The world is mine!  I could do anything.  The smallest thought of that compliment filled me with confidence.  But then I noticed that I subconsciously wouldn't give that beautiful idea more than a seconds thought.  "Why?"  I wondered.  It was a great thought.  Why don't I just focus on those words and take them in and let the words fill me with what I need.  I started to do just that and then quickly realized why I wouldn't allow it before.

Have you ever wondered why brains work the way they do?  Like why my brain would take such a lovely thought and start tearing it apart and doubting every stitch of it?  That is what my subconscious was protecting me from.  From my own degrading self.  As I started to contemplate what my friend had stated, I quickly thought of all the reasons why it didn't hold water.  "She doesn't know me that well."  "She has no idea if the world bows to me just because I smile."  "Most of the time, people think I'm just a pretty face that doesn't have anything else to offer."  "I'm pretty sure I'm the most boring person in the world and I only smile simply because I have nothing else to offer."

I had to push those thoughts quickly from my mind as I started to notice the anxiety building up and my heart beating faster.  I reset my brain and focused again, just for a moment, on the positive words, and then left it at that and went to work.

And the shoot was flawless!  The clouds came and went with out leaving a drop of rain.  The bride was the best person to work with and I had done something new.  Something that proved that I was more than just a mother of five, but that I could create beautiful new art all by myself.

 

 

But now that it's over I go back to my subconscious mind and wonder why would we be wired like that.  To distrust even the best parts of us.  I recently found out a friend of mine has been battling bulimia for years and has only now started a blog to help her fight the battle.  As I read her entries describing the hurtful inner voice that tells her she's ugly and fat, it sounds too familiar.   Why must we as women carry around such a hurtful inner voice.  Even the most positive of people (me included) have it there somewhere.  We just push it away so that it doesn't control us, but it's there just the same.    Please let's just be nice to each other and know that even the nice things we do can be twisted and turned ugly.  And absolutely, lets please not put anymore mean thoughts out there guys.

Be strong and try to trust the good!  We really are awesome!  We just need to believe in ourselves.
 That's all!  Oh and try new things!  It's invigorating!

Make Today Amazing!

So it's weird to sit down at my keyboard and not know at all about what I'm about to write.  The blog has been pulling at my fingers like a dog wanting to be petted, but I'm afraid that I'm not sure what to say.

Our summer has rocked so far, filled with new outings, water parks, swim parties, trips to lakes, hikes and awesome shaved ice.

And let's not forget the Fourth.  This Fourth of July was one of the best I have had in the last few years.  I was so happy to be able to share it with my sister Amy and her family who have been across the country in the land of Washington DC for the last 4 years.  And I especially loved the time that I got to share with the Hubby.  Brenden was the perfect date for the Fourth.  To be able to see this man relax and play when usually he works so hard is a joy to see!  It made my day!

 

Since the Fourth though I have been kind of in a funk.  I think it's because Independence Day has always marked the mid point of summer for me and that's a bit depressing.  I know, I know... I complained about the first week of summer in the last post, but I think we got into the groove of it since then and I hate to see it go so fast.  

So I have been watching old seasons of The Amazing Race this summer.  Oh how I love this show!!  If you've read my first post you know how I feel about travel and in a perfect world I would be the girl that dominates the whole race and wins the million dollars.  I'm not sure though, that the mom of five, who occasionally exercises and doesn't ever want to be dropped or dangled off the edge of something extremely high would be that dominator, but who knows.  There were those goat farmers who surprised us all, right?

Anyway, I've been watching it with the kids and there will be times when the teams are in some dirty third world city, sludging through filth to complete a road block that is just emulating what the people of that country do all the time.  Sometimes, the kids will state how they would never be able to do that and I of course chime in with words of wisdom that I hope will fill their heads with ideals of adventure, open-mindedness, and exploration. "Oh yes you can!"  "Can you imagine how it would be to live like this every day?  This is their life and it would be awesome to experience it!"  "It might seem hard to you, but these people do it all the time and look how happy they look!"

Soon I was actually imparting wisdom upon myself.  As I have been watching the show I find myself wishing I could experience all of that.  That's why people like us travel right?  To be able to see all the beautiful differences of this world and to experience how one place can be so differently defined...the good the bad and the ugly.  As I sit on my comfy red sectional, in my air conditioned house, watching my big (really not that big, but I'm trying to make a point here) screen TV,  I long for the chance to be in a hot, smelly village somewhere learning how they gather water for their people.  Why?  Because of  the knowledge I would gain, the experience, and the hidden joys that come from the adventure.  So why can't it be like that in our own life?

I know this is going to take you by surprise, but the life of a mom is not full of nights on the town and fancy clothes, and 5 star hotels.  There are a good number of days where you are sludging through filth, picking up food off the ground and sometimes serving it back to your kids (haha), and abandoning all attempts to look good as you set out to help and serve the locals, constantly learning new techniques (sometimes from the locals, sometimes to help the locals) and hopefully somewhere along the way finding the hidden joys that comes from this way of life.  So I should be jumping up and down with excitement!  I'm living the dream right?  Yes!

Chances are I will never be on The Amazing Race, but I think this month I have learned that this life is my amazing race.  I hope we can always find joy in it's ups and downs, road blocks and detours and be thankful for the opportunity even if we don't leave the race a millionaire.  So go out and try new foods, do new things and love every minute of the time you have.    After all, every adventure is worth while.

Happy Fourth of July Chalkboard

Time for my absolute favorite holiday ever.  That's right folks she even beats Christmas.  I am a little cuckoo over it but its the BEST time of the year hands down. 

Just being honest

As I take a personal time out and sit and listen to the chaos around my home I wonder what I was thinking celebrating this time of year.  Screams echo through the home... some happy, some angry, some sad.  The fridge opens and shuts at least six times in the 10 minutes I've been sitting here.  One child clings to my leg like shes hanging onto a rope, dangling above a tank of sharks complaining about how awful this summer is compared to others.   All the while holding a fake blood capsule in her hands pretending to pop it in my all white room, just trying to get my attention.  And then let's not forget the all too familiar, "Mom, I'm bored."  Ahh, the sweet sounds of summer.

As the last day of school approached I can promise you that I was more excited than the kids, but by lunchtime Monday my mind had changed.  I forgot how helpless my children are at finding their own fun!  When I was a kid, summer was a time when you were overjoyed just by the freedom it gave you!  Freedom to do whatever you wanted.  Play outside all day, read a book for hours, run through sprinklers, make forts, imagine.  Now all I get are complaints about how we haven't plan an extravagant expensive field trip every single day and heaven forbid if mom might have some responsibilities to take care of.  When did this happen!?  When did kids get this sense that their parents were responsible for anything more than a trip to the park or an occasional shaved ice if they were lucky?!

I have to confess that I totally fell into it this first week of summer and we did a lot of fun things. I had originally thought this post would highlight all those fun things, but it occurred to me that the reason my kids want to do all these crazy things (and me as well), is because we have seen all the creative summer posts on facebook and read all the blogs from the super moms and feel like some how we aren't doing summer justice if we don't.  So this is not going to be one of those posts.

Instead this post is dedicated to the "crazy" behind the amazing photos we all share.

Here are the cute photos I shared from the outing we took to Farmington trail last Tuesday.  So pretty. Everyone looks so happy.  That's because just hours before this mom was at the end of her rope and after yelling at the kids about how she was not going to do anything else fun for them this week, shipping one of the kids off to a friends house, and stressing through an orthodontists appointment with  4 crazy kids, she just needed them out of the car.  Kids are happy because they are not stuck in their rooms like I had threatened earlier. And what you didn't see in these photos is how our cute five year old decided she just couldn't walk anymore and how I pulled her behind me the entire way back to the car.  See, doesn't that inspire you to walk that same trail!?

Here are the photos of our amazing trip to Carver Cove petting farm.  It really was a ton of fun, but what you don't see is our 18 month old being pulled off their tractor a dozen times, all the sneezing from the cotton flying around (that was at the trail as well), and lets not forget jack throwing up the next day from what all we can guess is a case of not washing his hands well enough before eating lunch.  Yuck!

And this ones for the moms.

 Let's not forget the cute selflies that make us all want to get our hair done, put on make up and pretend to causally take photos that look like we just woke up perfectly put together.








 "Yeah, we just happened to be wasting time, so we snapped a random shot, looked beautiful, and shared it with the world."









No.








Lets not hide the fact that there are a dozen bad selfies...










for every one...

that we share.





haha  :)





So this summer lets set a good example to all our kids and be grateful and happy with who we are and what's in front of us.


And absolutely go out and have fun but don't do it because you feel like you have to.






Let's do it for ourselves...






 and let's try to cut out some of the "crazy" this summer!